Comments on: Love or Respect

By: Morphea

Morphea — Thu, 25 Aug 2005 00:51:44 +0000

Well, let me tell you that in this ONE INSTANCE, this ONE woman doesn’t want love more than respect. And I don’t think I’m atypical as a woman. And as a human being who knows several men and women, I just plain disagree.

It’s not that I don’t think there are differences between people groups about what they desire/need/whatever. But I really think generalizing on the whole is stupid, pointless and mostly just inaccurate. I just don’t see the point in doing it, even in marriage conferences – people need to be cared for and approached on a person-by-person basis, I think.

And it’s not because I’m some sort of femi-nazi, Swoosh. More of an anti-generalizationist, I guess.

Sorry to shout and say the word, “bullocks”, people. [smile]

By: Swoosh

Swoosh — Wed, 24 Aug 2005 21:17:16 +0000

he he…
false gender labelling is one thing, but saying both sexes are or want the same things is another which I can’t quite agree with, sexist or not…

By: HASH

HASH — Tue, 23 Aug 2005 00:13:59 +0000

LOL… My goodness Morphea! 🙂

By: Morphea

Morphea — Mon, 22 Aug 2005 22:12:54 +0000

David, I don’t know what marriage conference you were at, but I think that’s total bollocks. What’s more, it sounds pretty damned sexist. But, since I agree that love and respect are nearly inseparable concepts, it’s pretty much moot anyway. I HATE IT when people do the “men want this, women want that” thing. GRRRRRR!! Not growing at you, brother. Growling at false gender labelling.

Swoosh and Hash, I’m pretty sure that grapes represent sex to Hash, which would probably explain a lot, could we ask his wife?

Cerise

By: Swoosh

Swoosh — Mon, 22 Aug 2005 14:45:24 +0000

that is my point…
follow the original question of love and respect, comparable to that of apples and oranges.
then throw in hash’s statement about grapes, and you have the meaning.
if apple=love then it can stand by itself through time (ie. the fermentation proces, but it does take time-I don’t buy the love at first site theory)
then if grapes = the great unknown that hash refer’s to, it too can stand on its as a fine wine, again after a period of time.
but if oranges= respect, well, it really has to be mixed with something to become truly effective in a relationship, or else it does become authoritarian and seruyange mentioned….

By: David Seruyange

David Seruyange — Mon, 22 Aug 2005 14:38:19 +0000

I went to a Christian marriage conference and the entire premise behind it was that men want “respect” and women want “love.” But as a married guy I have to admit that I’d have a hard time loving my wife if I couldn’t respect her. And I have to also admit that I’d have a hard time with the wife just saying she respected me without being able to accompany it with “love.” I’m sure she could respect a cop that pulled her over without love and I don’t like the idea of being an authoritarian.

Anywho, I ramble…

By: HASH

HASH — Sat, 20 Aug 2005 16:26:06 +0000

My thoughts exactly… I’m lost Swoosh. Your wisdom is beyond me.

By: aly hawkins

aly hawkins — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 15:46:58 +0000

Umm….

By: Swoosh

Swoosh — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 14:53:54 +0000

ah semantics…what is love? what is respect?
What are we referring to here? Is my vision comparable to that of others? From where I stand an apple tree and an orange tree are pretty different, and grapes vines even moreso.
You can’t have one without the other but you can have the other without the one, so is this a parasitic relationship going on, or is this a mutally dependent relationship?
Grapes make wine, and cider can be fermented…but orange juice? Goes good with Vodka I guess…

By: meg

meg — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 12:47:21 +0000

i think it might be a culturally loaded question. there are a lot of people out there who seem to have a misdirected conception of what love is. and in that misdirection respect may not play a key role. but in a wholistic understanding of love and respect the two go hand in hand. but i would also say that in the ideal sense love should provide the foundation for respect. although, if you look at some relationships respect seems to come first. hmmmmm….